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S03e11 weak in the knees
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The Ghost Zone. We see several glowing purple doors floating in the aether.
Box Ghost [Popping up and waving his hands.] Beware! [Clearing his throat and continuing in a deeper voice, gesturing dramatically.] Beware! [Trying again with different intonation.] Beware. [Flying past several unimpressed ghosts in a cemetery.] Beware!
Two of Walker's goons post a wanted poster for Wulf, for $1,000,000.
Box Ghost [Popping up again and wiggling his fingers.] Be--what? [Turning and noticing the poster; indignant.] One million for an overgrown dog? [Floating to the next poster, which is for Vortex.] Two million for an overgrown cloud? [Moving on to Undergrowth's.] Three million for an overgrown ficus?! [Throwing his hands up.] Chump change! For those ghosts pale in comparison to me, the Box Ghost! Imagine the value of a ghost that terrorizes with corrugated cardboard [Holding up a sample.] and the occasional roll of bubble-wrap! [Pulling out a roll of bubble-wrap from hammer space.] It must make the head spin! [His own head flies up off his neck and spins in the air before settling back in place.]
A crumpled ball of paper hits him in the head, and he unwads it. It is his "wanted" poster, which reads "Not wanted. $2.50 or best offer."
Box Ghost [Reading.] "Not wanted"?! [Tears it apart.] This is an outrage! Do I not inspire fear and loathing? [The top of his head comes off, his purple colored brain popping out.]
Several nameless ghosts start laughing at him.
Box Ghost Stop your chortling at my expense! [They do, but keep smiling.] The Box Ghost can be threatening, ominous, uh....threatening! [Pointing emphatically.] I will prove it to you! You will all rue the day you underestimated my awesome four-sided ability to terrorize!
The Box Ghost zips off to a a floating warehouse on a small rock island, entering through the window.
Box Ghost And with the aid of some very special boxes, [We see that the room is packed with various types of boxes.] I will bring stackable, packable terror to them all! Beware! [Impressed with himself] Ooh, that's good...
The trio walks through the Amity Park park archway.
Sam [Exasperated.] This is nuts! We've been capturing and recapturing the Box Ghost all day long!
Tucker What's up with these boxes he's using? [Holding up a photo of the Box Ghost egging on a fanged postal box.] I mean, the Mailbox of Misfortune?
Danny I know. All I got from that was a paper cut. [Mimicking the Box Ghost's pose.] Ooh, so menacing.
Sam And the ring from the Jewelry Box of Despair [Holds up one hand. The index finger is green.] didn't do anything but turn my finger green. How is that scary?
Tucker Cubic zirconium is pretty terrifying.
Danny Well, he's attacked seven times, and we've sent him back to the Ghost Zone seven times. I think he's finally gotten the message. [His ghost sense goes off.]
A shadow falls over them and they all look up.
Sam Maybe you need to write it down.
Naturally, it's the Box Ghost who shows up.
Box Ghost [Holding up a lunchbox with a skull on it.] Behold! The Lunchbox of Fear! [He opens it, and a glowing thermos flies out. Danny catches it.]
Danny Hey, bringing your own thermos to our battles now? You know, you could save us some time by showing up already inside it.
Box Ghost [Swirling light emanating from the Lunchbox of Fear.] And now, taste your multi-grain doom! [He holds the lunchbox aloft, and a stream of sandwiches jets out of it. Sandwiches start raining from the sky, one of them hitting a woman in a purple dress.]
Purple Dress Lady [Pointing excitedly.] Look, that caterer brought free lunch for everyone!
Assorted townsfolk start cheering and grabbing sandwiches.
Box Ghost No, no, I am no caterer! My sandwiches are very high in calories! They will totally clog your arteries!
Sam [Scoffing.] In like, forty years!
Box Ghost Yeah, so? It is a slow death!
Tucker and Danny start eating their sandwiches.
Box Ghost Wait...what are you doing?
Danny Tasting our doom. And I gotta tell ya, it's a little dry.
Tucker You wouldn't happen to have any Spicy Mustard of Doom, would ya?
The Box Ghost makes a frustrated sound and flies off.
Cut to the Amity Park Mall. The trio is walking past a store called Shoes and Pillows.
Tucker [Burping.] Is it me, or are those sandwiches making anyone else burp?
Sam Well, when you eat four of them...
Tucker Hey, free food is free food, even if it's vaguely evil.
Danny's ghost sense goes off.
Danny Guys, I think it's time for dessert.
The Box Ghost is back.
Box Ghost Behold! [Holds up a shoe box with a skull on it.] The Shoe Box of Terror! [The box starts to glow.]
Danny [Skeptically.] I'm sorry, but, how are shoes scary?
Tucker Dude, have you smelled yours?
Box Ghost When it comes to terror shoes, one size fits all. [He opens the box and a stream of shoes jets out, hitting several shoppers.]
Random shoppers Ow!
Purple Dress Lady Hey, everyone, the catering shoe salesman is giving out free samples! [We see the same people from the park catching shoes and exclaiming happily.]
Box Ghost [Furious.] I am not a catering shoe salesman! You are supposed to tremble as my menacing footwear pinches your feet like nobody's business!
Red Hair Chick [Holding up a purple pump.] Do you have these in a size eight?
Box Ghost Ugh! What do I have to do to get people to tremble around here? [Going intangible, he flies off through the ceiling.]
Danny Looks like the shoe is on the other foot now. [Sam and Tucker look at him flatly.] What? It was the only shoe pun I had.
Later, The Box Ghost is shown flying through the Ghost Zone looking ticked. He approaches Pandora's realm.
Box Ghost Ignore me will they? Well they shall know real terror when they see the most dreaded box in my collection! Which is ehm, actually not in my collection as such. Yet! Pandora's box... [Hovers over Pandora's box.] Those of us in the box trade have dreamed of this, the most concentrated collection of evil in the ghost zone or any realm in a confinement compact and luxury case. [Swipes Pandora's box off the pedestal.] And now it is mine!
A three headed dog appears and starts growling.
Box Ghost Hehe, nice doggies.
Pandora [Angry.] What's going on?! Who's down there!
Box Ghost Ehh, I'm from the warehouse! Just picking up your box for storage. [Whispering.] And by storage I mean using it to bring the world to its knees. [Going intangible, he escapes trough the door.]
Pandora [Screaming.] Who dares steal from Pandora! You will pay for this!
Cut to The Box Ghost, who is hiding in the ghostly forest.
Skulker You stole from Pandora? Not wise!
Box Ghost Not bowing to me is not wise! Wait... is that right? The double negative is confusing. Anyway. Prepare to meet the ultimate evil!
Box Ghost opens Pandora's Box manically laughing. A tiny, cute, smiling pink unicorn comes out.
Box Ghost [Surprised.] Huh?!
Skulker You, terrifying? [Chuckles.] You're dreaming. [Box Ghost turns an angry red and growls.] My dearest ... You almost sound... Frightening...
Box Ghost [Still red.] Really? Awesome! [The unicorn turns into a monstrous version of itself and blasts Skulker with a ray from its horn. Skulker flies of, scared. Cut to Box Ghost surrounded by a ghostly blue smoke, laughing.] T'is so cool to sound evil!